I Was Fast When I Was Young

She panicked when voices came from the door of the next apartment. However, she had just laid on her bed. It took a long time to even find the remote. But succumbing to her curiosity and even more of her anxiety, she began to attempt to get up. Her son and daughter-in-law lived next door. She was responsible for the house’s safety when they were not home. Because thieves had entered the house twice before, they tried for the third time but could not enter due to the trap-lock they had installed. Many gold and valuables were stolen for this reason. As such, whenever the young couple went out, she was the guard of the next apartment. This order has been going on for 20 years. She wasn’t even complaining. But even if the order remained the same, she could not remain the same. She was younger then. If she heard a sound on the side, she would run with small steps and open her door by putting on the chain and see who had come. Usually, it would be her grandchild. But she was no longer as fast as she used to be. Although there were disadvantages of aging, she now had worse problems. Her doctor said her brain was shrinking, and her skull was filling with water. She wondered how the brain could be filled with water. At that time, she was visiting the hospitals individually and getting every limb looked at. She didn’t have a single problem. Despite the age of 82, she was in good health. But no one expected that a water-filled skull could cause so much trouble. She was dizzy when she stood up, especially when she walked. Because of this, she was getting blackouts and falling to the ground. It became so frequent that her daughter-in-law bought her a walker as time passed. Because the last time she fell, she slit her head, and it took them all day to clean the blood from the floor.

But the sound of the next door made her oodles of suspicion. It was no ordinary door opening sound. Even though she couldn’t go running as she used to, she had to go and look slowly. She started struggling to get out of bed. She couldn’t pull herself to the edge of the bed like she used to. So she floundered like a worm, reaching the edge of the bed. She pulled the small ladder before her to get out of bed. They bought this bed when they moved. It was much higher than the old bed. She specifically wanted it back then. Now that bed had become a persecution for her. Thankfully, her bride had bought her a ladder. She stepped on the ladder first with her right foot, then with her left foot. Supporting her with her hands, she pushed herself forward. She managed to stand up, albeit shaking. Her eye immediately went to her walker. But it was just around the corner. Far away, at least for her. Worry prevented her from thinking straight. After a few seconds of hesitation, she gave up the walker and headed for the door. She started walking with tiny steps. She opened her half-open door fully, grasping the threshold with her right hand, trying to get support with her absent strength. She passed like a turtle through the orange doorway and entered the long corridor. Nowadays, this corridor was also a particular problem for her. She used to flaunt it to others, saying that her flat was too long. She used to say you can’t catch up if the phone rings in the back. Nowadays, when she looks down the corridor, it reminds her of a depressing journey. And because of that, instead of going to the living room, she would run back to her room every time she saw the corridor. But she had to look at the door. For this reason, she had to cross the corridor as quickly as possible and reach the door with difficulty.

As soon as she took her first step, her head spun. The corridor suddenly began to tilt left and right, like a ship traveling in the Black Sea. Her body began to lean to the left, and after a while, she began to fall. She grabbed the wall with her hand and blocked her fall. It was a brave move. If she had gone to the kitchen to get water, she would have already fallen. But a thief could be breaking into the house of her son and daughter-in-law. Thieves usually rob at noon, when people are always on the street. At least, she thinks so. The narrowness of the street, the fact that everyone in the shops knew each other, or the steel door could not convince her that thieves could not enter the house. As her dizziness subsided, she took a small step forward and began her quest to become a hero. Just after the left step came a right step. Then a left, then another right. Just when she was thinking that she would easily reach the door like this, she felt that uncertain feeling that her head would spin. She touched the wall with the 4 fingers of her right hand, excluding the thumb. She wasn’t pressing her fingers. But even the fact that her skin wasn’t touching the wall entirely gave her a sense of security.

When the world stopped spinning, she kept walking. But she didn’t take her fingers off the wall. Like Freddy Krueger, she began to shuffle her fingers against the wall. She didn’t know who Freddy was, though. Freddy was released too late in her country. She was married when it was released. Her husband would not send her to such films anyway. Horror movies were disgusting abominations, according to her husband. She was the bride of a conservative family. Although these are stories of very different subjects…

After a few more steps, she took her fingers off the wall. She didn’t realize it, but the paint on the wall was slightly on her fingertips. She didn’t realize it because whoever was at the door was already inside. The thieves may have already stolen things from the house. She had to quickly reach her own door and shout who is this. She was halfway down the corridor. She was now at her sister’s doorstep. At that moment, it occurred to her that if she had called out to her sister, if she had looked, everything would have been much easier. Her sister had no trouble walking like her. But she also had a big hump on her back. She was walking without looking up. But at least she could walk. It hadn’t occurred to her at that moment. After walking this far, she could no longer call out to her. As much as she walked, she had to shout that much to get her up. She was half deaf. She could not hear any sound coming from outside because of the noise created by the only channel in her room that had never been closed for 12 years. Instead of fighting her time and rushing her to the door, she risked walking the rest of the way.

Left, right, left, right. She passed her sister’s room. The door was on the left, just around the corner. It bothered her that she still couldn’t reach the door that her grandson could reach in 3 seconds with an endless pain that spread to all his muscles. Yes, at that moment, she wasted time thinking about this. Because the prosthesis on her hip hurt. She broke this prosthesis once before and did not have the heart to break it a second time. She shouldn’t have walked anyway. But duty is duty.

She continued to take small steps while thinking. As the noise of the relic refrigerator grew louder, she realized she was approaching the door. The kitchen and the entrance were next to each other. She kept walking, focusing on the noise. But as she closed the door, her excitement began to increase. As her excitement grew, her steps began to grow. Everyone in the family was warning her about this, you are in no hurry, you are over 80 years old, you can walk slowly. She was used to it since she was young. She raised three children and a husband. The word slow had lost meaning in the past years while she was running to everything. Everything was in a hurry for her; everything had to be taken care of immediately. She was a fixer when she was younger, yes, but now she’s 82. She was an old woman who broke a prosthesis because she fell, had 2 surgeries, and had water in her brain. Unfortunately, she could never accept this. She sometimes admitted her age, but sometimes she longed to be her old self. Almost at the door, she fell into this longing again.

She got excited about the way she had come with small steps to the corner and started walking with big steps. Her curiosity and uneasiness began to increase as she approached the door, just as the need increased when everybody got closer to the toilet. Curiosity took over her mind so that she completely forgot that she could fall. The world was already spinning on its own, right? Everything went well for her, albeit for a few seconds. She had reached the corner. Turning the corner made her happy, like a landscape discovered from scratch. She was tired of seeing that boring, narrow, and long corridor. As she turned the corner, she saw the lights from the living room window hitting the door. A peace came over her. She was happy not only to see the sun but also to be able to reach her goal. Now all she had to do was unchain the door and turn the handle.

She grabbed the corner of the wall with her left hand. Extended her right hand to the chain. She wanted to put her right foot close to the door to keep her balance. But that step would be a small step for humanity yet a giant leap for her. Her head began to spin as she took a step. The door was divided into 4 at once, swung left and right. At that time, she was taking her right hand to the chain. But the chain suddenly began to pull away from her. The door opposite her began to descend below the horizon. She swung her free hand on the chain toward the doorknob. There were also 3 doorknobs. At that moment, she caught the doorknob passing before her and, luckily, chose the right one. Her son had just oiled the doorknob. For this reason, the door opened, albeit with a slight push. Of course, although her son had oiled the doorknob, he had forgotten the screws on the door. The door opened, albeit a few inches, and the entire building groaned with a creak, indicating that it had opened. But she couldn’t see that. Because the door that stood before her a few milliseconds ago no longer existed. She had a ceiling on her horizon. She saw the trace, left by the -who knows when- killed mosquito on the ceiling before she crashed to the ground.

She hit her head so severely that even horror movies don’t have such a sound effect. She had slit her head before, but this time it was more successful. So much so that in a few seconds, she would close her eyes to the life she had lived for 82 years. But of course, she didn’t understand that. She was so immune to falling pain that she couldn’t feel it. She could only realize the situation when a doctor or family member expressed the seriousness of her injuries. It didn’t matter now. She could see the apartment corridor from where she fell. The door was half open because she couldn’t remove the chain. Only the hall and stairs were visible. She never moved. She stared, unmoving, to see what was going on in the hallway. Nothing was happening in the hallway. The automatic lights were on, as they must have seen her feet near the door. She stared at the empty corridor for a while longer. The blood flowing from her severed head caressed her right cheek and passed to her neck. She liked the warmth on her cheek, but couldn’t understand why. Because she was focusing on the corridor at the time. Her eyes were slowly starting to darken. But she thought it was the hallway light turning off. Since the light in the hallway was slowly going out, she thought no one was home. She was relieved. Her vision began to darken. A life of 82 years was ending her life in a pool of blood. But she didn’t notice it. Perhaps it was best not to know that she had died. It is difficult for the survivors. With the sweet warmth on her right cheek, she was saying goodbye, thinking no one was entering her son’s house. The absolute nightmare was not for her, of course, but for those who would find her there.


Ukrainian Creative Director | Motion Picture Writer | Horror Freak

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